Mind on my money

A few weeks ago I was pondering the phenomenon of Japanese people insisting on paying for us when we went out to dinner. Last night, we had some friends around, and a few stories were told about the other extreme...

One story involved one of our guests, lets call him "Albert". Last week was his second-to-last class with a group of students and there was talk of them taking "Albert" out to dinner. "Albert" said that sounds lovely, but lets go to a cheap, blue-collar nomiya where we can get pissed and eat standard izakaya food for next to nix.

Well, come his last class (last Friday) he discovers that they have already made a reservation at a place in Shinjuku. They all show up to the izakaya, which turns out to be an expensive, posh-o izakaya, with a high-priced (but still standard fare) menu. "Albert" had an average time, these students not being among his favourites, but when the bill came out at 4,000 yen ($A60) per head, the students did not even offer to pay for him. Now, "Albert" is not one for begrudging a few thou for a good night out, but after he'd suggested going to a cheap place, he was understandably pissed off.

I don't pretend to know what was going on with these students' behaviour, as, to be honest, I think its a bizarre exception to the rule. But Akio (our Osakan friend who's more Aussie than his wife, Catherine) gave us some insight into the attitudes toward money here...

It comes down to one word - Show. Its all Show. For someone growing up in Japan, 4,000 yen doesn't seem like a lot of money; its only when we convert it to the aussie/canadian/american dollar that we step back and say, "fuck mate, that's a bit rich, innit?" And many Japanese simply don't acknowledge that maybe some people can't afford to pay top-dollar for a few sakes and a couple of rolls of sushi.

The people who lavishly order the most expensive items on a menu in order to present an air of extravagance, are often the same people who eat ramen in their shitty little apartments for the rest of the week. And there is an expectation that everyone else does the same and should pay up big when the bill comes.

A similar attitude can be seen among the chicks who MUST HAVE their designer Louis Vuitton bags. Now, these bags are the fugliest brown and cream monstrosities known to man, but because they have the LV label they are seen as a necessity. Keep in mind that the LV bags do not appeal to a specific demographic - women of all ages from late teens to late 80's obachans (grandmothers) tote these motherfuckers (Akio calls these bags "Oba-tton").

But the girls who fork out around $A1000 to buy the world's drabbest accessory, do not all have wealthy families, high-paying jobs or filthy old sugar-daddies to support them. They go without other stuff (like FOOD for example) to pay for them.

Yeah, I know materialism exists in all societies, but its obscene here, it really is. I understand the Japanese need to keep "face" and know that sometimes this translates as having to put on a big, expensive show to keep status with colleagues and friends, but if you offer to take someone out to thank them for teaching you for 6 months, then for fucks sake, offer to pay for them!