The Funk of 40,000 eggs

Days 7-8 - Unzen

Missed Days 1-2? Day 3? Day 4? Don't tell me you missed Days 5-6 as well?

Unzen stinks. There's no nicer way to put it.

It is an active volcano on the Shimabara peninsula, about a 2 hour bus ride east of Nagasaki. When we got off the bus, the sulphuric stench invaded our nostrils and killed most of our smell receptors. Imagine 40,000 rotten eggs bubbling away in a ditch and you get the general idea.

"I didn't do it!"

I'd originally booked a ryokan (which shall remain nameless) which was pretty expensive, but we budgeted for it 'cos we wanted a truly sublime onsen experience to end our trip.

When we showed up at the ryokan (backpacks in tow) Matt said to the guy that we had a reservation. Instead of treating us like guests and ushering us in (which, naively, we may have expected considering the price of the place), he automatically whipped out his calculator, added the taxes and showed us the total price on the calculator and asked us if we were sure we wanted to pay that much. There was an uncomfortable silence as he held out the calculator and waited for our response.

Now, I don't know about you, but when I confirm a reservation I usually know how much I'm gonna have to fork out. I'm no snob, but when a hotel knows we're coming, I expect at least a "Konnichiwa". Nothing. The ryokan was colder than a nun's tittie. In short? This place really sucked and we hadn't even made it past the foyer. It sucked all the more passionately, because we'd been welcomed with open arms everywhere else.

We confirmed that, yes, we understood how much it was. Matt muttered under his breath, "Do you get the feeling we're not welcome here?"

I nodded, "Uh-huh" and we informed our "host" that perhaps we'd go somewhere else. He hid his disappointment well. When we were out the door we both said in unison, "Fuck that for a joke".

I may not be in the hospitality industry, but I'm pretty sure that if someone walks in and offers to give you money to stay there, you do your damnedest not to put them off. It wasn't like the ryokan was teeming with guests either.

Roadside prayer

The Information Centre was renovating, so we turned to the trusty Lonely Planet for accommodation advice. Not knowing what to expect, we called one of the numbers for a kokuminshukusha (an inexpensive government subsidised guesthouse in so-called "scenic places") called Seiun-so.

"Did they have any rooms?" Why Yes! "Erm, we are outside the Information Centre; how do we get to the guesthouse?" Why! We'll come and pick you up!

Now, that's more like it!

Seiun-so is in a remote part of Unzen; a huge hotel with an onsen for guest use which is also open to the public. 24 hours a day. The Japanese style rooms were modern and comfortable and the front of house staff, friendly.

As soon as we checked in we had lunch in the public restaurant next to the onsen baths. One very typical aspect of onsen culture is that after a relaxing bath, bathers tend to retire to the restaurant and pass out next to the low tables. The onsen even provides cane pillows (not v. comfortable?) for convenience. While we were eating, there were maybe 12 people fast asleep, snoring their arses off.

And don't even start me on the baths. They were not as stinky as the town, but the sulphur content is very high and apparently very good for rheumatism and dermatological problems. Dicky Knee was in the rare and unfortunate position of onsen baths being very bad for her. DK needed ice, not deep heat. But damn, was it good. I also realised just how much I enjoy getting nude in front of others. Liberating, wot.

That night, Dicky Knee had a tanty and refused to work. Matt asked her, "So was the onsen worth the pain?" Dicky Knee, in her grumpy condition, countered, "Fuck yes" (mouthy little joint aint she?)

For 7,500 yen, Seiun-so offered stellar accommodation, 24 hour access to the onsen and an amazing Japanese meal and buffet breakfast. Exhausted after all our bathing activity, we spent the night drinking vending machine sho-chu (potato liquor) and playing "Waterworks".

At 6.30 a.m, we had another bath, just as the sun was rising. I scored the outdoor bath (rotenburo) all to myself, there was a layer of frost on the trees and the sky was just breaking into a flurry of early morning pinks and blues.

The moral of this story is that you don't have to pay a pretty packet to get fantastic hospitality, food and experience.

Before getting back on the bus to make the long (9 hours) journey home, we wandered around Unzen town to check out the jigoku (hells) - sulphuric water fountains bubbling away just above the earth's crust.

Onsen Tamago

We also tucked into an onsen specialty, "Onsen Tamago" which are eggs boiled in the hells. Considering the hells smelt like eggs it was no surprise that the eggs tasted like... boiled eggs. There was nothing particularly unusual about the taste. But you know, you've got to try these things.

Unzen Photo Gallery...

Tomorrow - back to the Tokyo grindstone